How to be Successful in Every Relationship
You Get what You Give
A mother and her adult daughter were out shopping one day, trying to make the most of a big sale weekend before Christmas. As they went from store to store in the mall, the older woman complained about everything: the crowds, the poor quality of merchandise, the price and her sore feet. After the mother experienced a particularly difficult interaction with a clerk in one department store, she turned to her daughter and said, “I’m never going back in that store again. Did you see that dirty looks she gave me?” The daughter answered, “She didn’t give it you, Mom. You had it when you went in!”[1] When we interact with others our attitude often sets the tone for how we treat each other.
A Positive Attitude Breeds a Positive Attitude
One of the things that I appreciate about Texas is its friendliness. If I am walking in my neighborhood, and I pass someone on the sidewalk they always look at me, smile and say “hi”. Sometimes, they will even stop and chat for a little while. Now as a Pennsylvanian, this took me a bit aback at first. While I do consider Pennsylvania a pretty friendly place, we still have our limits. And if you ever have visited the Big Apple, New York City, you can hardly get someone to look you in the eye, let alone say “hi” if you want past them on the street. But here is what I have noticed, that no matter where I go if someone even just smiles, let alone is friendly, I am much more apt to be friendly back. And if someone is, let’s say less that friendly, then I am much more guarded and on the defensive. And so I have made it a practice to not wait for them to say “hi” but say it first. And invariably a smile always crosses their face.
So if you want to enjoy mostly pleasant interactions with people as you go through you day, treat others well. While it will not work 100% of the time (there are still cranks), I have discovered that our positive attitude toward others can encourage them to have a positive attitude toward you.
A Challenge
Here is what I want to encourage you to do; for the next 30 days act as though everyone you meet is the most important person on earth (remember he is to himself). See what happens. See if not only their attitude toward you changes, but especially with those difficult people, see how your attitude toward them might change.
Conversation
What do you see as some of the challenges of having a positive attitude toward others?
What can you do every day to make sure that your attitude is positive towards others?
[1]John Maxwell, Today Matters, 42